I didn’t see it coming. I thought we were a happy couple. We were together over 20 years; we were best friends, we shared everything. We laughed, we made plans for the future. And then I was blindsided. There were (and still are) so many unanswered questions. What did I do wrong? When did he stop loving me? Is there someone else? Time stood still. The days felt endless and the nights were worse. Going to bed alone, I never…
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We’ve ALL been there… Something happens that just throws off our day/week/month and suddenly everything feels unmanageable and we wonder how we’ve found ourselves feeling like this, yet again. This, my friends, means it might be time to throw yourself a pity party. I know: this might sound weird, but hear me out! For so long, the term “pity party” has been used as a way to mock someone who is being overly dramatic in overreacting to a bad situation.…
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I used to present myself to the world very differently. I built a façade that I wanted the world to see, that I was happy, in a wonderful marriage and very successful. But then I went through a divorce that shook me to my core, and I was forced to admit that my life wasn’t so perfect. I lost my marriage, my home, and because my ex and I had worked together, also my career. I began to question my…
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“I went to war for what we had; you never even laced up your boots.” – N.R. Shepherd You spent years trying to turn your relationship into the type of partnership that you had hoped for – one where you (always) had each other’s backs, celebrated one another’s “whole” selves, enjoyed moments of playfulness and shared intimacy. You wholeheartedly invested your time, money, energy, and other resources to make it work. You were selfless. You were hopeful. You trusted the…
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I founded Hello Divorce as a result of my own adversity. When I think about it now, I am convinced that all that we have in life is the capacity to turn obstacles into opportunities—breakups into breakthroughs. My desire to become a lawyer was birthed out of a disempowering and lonely experience I had with the legal system as a late teen. I was both a witness in a criminal action case and a plaintiff in a civil case. As…
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Sometimes, the right playlist is everything. If you’ve decided that 2018 is the year you are going to pursue divorce and start the next chapter of your life, we’ve put together a Spotify playlist to lift your spirits and keep you feeling positive, motivated and ready to go the distance.
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(This post originally appeared on Worthy.com.) As a seasoned divorce lawyer, I see far too many of my clients putting off the one thing they absolutely need to be doing throughout this emotionally complex process: making time for self-care. You are being pulled in so many different directions and are experiencing a sea of transitions – it is so easy to get swept up in the stress of it all that physical and mental health take a back seat. But…
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The holidays are hard. And not just Aunt Ethel’s stale fruitcake hard. Navigating this time of year alone for the first time post separation or divorce can stir emotions or wreak havoc on the progress you’ve already made in getting through to the next chapter of your life. So, we tapped the experts – people who have been in your shoes – for their advice on holiday survival: 1. Give Yourself a Special Gift “Invest in yourself. You might not…
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It’s easy to get swept up in negative feelings during divorce. You’re separating in half a life you may have lived for many, many years. In addition to division of tangible assets, you’re likely also dividing precious memories and perhaps even friendships. But, remember: you got this. You’re on your way toward new memories, new experiences and a new version of you. And there are other benefits to your divorce that you may not have realized: A Chance to Realize…
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One of my favorite quotes about self-care comes from my friend and colleague Annie Wright, a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist who runs Annie Wright Psychotherapy, based in Berkeley. “Self-care doesn’t always look like sleep, yoga or green juice,” she often says. And she is SO right. But sometimes self-care becomes this thing that you have to plan and make time for and commit to. Maybe it starts to feel like a chore because so many people keep telling you…
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