Download: Divorce Glossary of Terms
Legalese made easy. This document has all the terms you’re likely to hear with definitions in plain English. Join us and download this free glossary of legal terms.
Spouse
Will you be requesting payments of spousal support? Or will your spouse be requesting a payment from you? There are no hard-and-fast rules governing spousal support. Understanding the law will help you to limit your exposure or maximize your result.
We also cover the range of issues that could come up like, such as what to do if you suspect your spouse is hiding assets, how to determine your date of separation for purposes of dividing property and determining the length of support, and whether or not you will be able to collect social security based on your spouse’s employment record.
Our Favorites:
The Hello Divorce Worksheet
This worksheet breaks down all of the things you need to think through and resolve before you can finalize your divorce.
Ten Important Laws You Need to Know About (if You’re Getting a Divorce in California)
1. Spousal Support (Family Code Section 4320): While pre-judgment spousal support is generally calculated using a formula, long-term spousal support is determined by review of various factors. Some of the factors the court considers include:...
Complete List of CA, CO, UT Divorce Forms—with Links
Our exhaustive list of California divorce forms with links to download them.
Social Security Benefits & Divorce – 10 Facts You Need to Know
1. A marriage of at least 10 years triggers social security rights. 2. Ten years is defined as Date of Marriage to Date of Divorce. So, for example, even if you separated with your spouse...
When are Attorney Fees Awarded in a Divorce Action in California?
It’s no secret that hiring an attorney is expensive. Even if you are using a lawyer on a ‘limited scope’ basis to help you only with strategy or to review and revise your forms, it...
Email and Divorce: Four Important Tips
For many of us, email is a primary method of communication for everything from connecting with family members and friends to running our businesses and talking to our children’s teachers. Email can be super helpful...
Which Type of Mediation Would Work Best for You? The Three Types, Explained
Wondering what type of mediator is right for you? Michael Lubofsky shares an informative resource explaining the three general types of mediation services. If one or more of these techniques piques your interest, ask your...
Keeping Divorce Conversations Productive
First things first. If you want to negotiate an agreement with your spouse, you have to remember (and accept) the following principles: • Be mindful that your purpose is to avoid arguing and to be...
Should I File a Response to Divorce in California?
If you have been served with the Summons (FL-110) and Petition for Dissolution of Marriage (FL-100), you are the Respondent. Once you’ve been served, you have to file a Response (FL-120) within 30 days unless...
I Missed the Deadline to Respond to My Spouse’s Petition for Divorce in California. What Do I Do Now?
If you missed the deadline to file your Response to the Petition (30 days after the date of personal service), you will first need to confirm whether or not your spouse has filed a Request...
I am not on title to our California house, is it still joint property?
Is your house still joint property if you’re not on the title? Well the long answer is “maybe, and the short answer is, probably “yes!” Why can’t lawyers just say “yes” or “no?” Why does...
My spouse can earn more but refuses to. How is this handled for purposes of Child Support?
When we calculate child support, we generally use the actual incomes of both spouses. But what happens when your spouse is under earning? That is, s/he is working less than full time and/or is not...
Presenting Evidence in Family Court
Most people don’t expect the Evidence Code to apply in family law. The fact is, it often does. Even when standing before a judge with an informal approach (i.e., they allow evidence to be considered...
What to Wear to Court
As a general rule, you should think of the courtroom as a formal environment. Dress as you would when going for an important job interview or to church. You can be barred from the courtroom...
Dividing Personal Property in a Divorce in California
Because personal property is defined as everything that you and your spouse own that is not real property (real estate), this category covers a vast number of items. Here is a list of typical examples...
Spousal Support A-Z in California
A key issue that arises in divorce proceedings is spousal support, AKA alimony. Spousal support comes in two varieties: temporary spousal support and long-term spousal support. It must be requested by one of the parties....
Options for Long-Term Spousal Support in California
In a nutshell, long-term spousal support (also referred to as ‘post judgment’ support or ‘permanent’ support) usually lasts for up to half the length of the marriage (assuming your marriage is less than 10 years)....
10+ (Non-legal) Essential Apps to Rely on While Uncoupling
Getting unmarried can sometimes be as expensive, insanely time consuming and detail driven as planning your wedding. When we tie the knot in the first place, we use wedding planners, online worksheets, and various other...
10 Tips for Writing a Persuasive Family Law Declaration to be Attached to a California Request for Orders
A declaration is a written statement made under the penalty of perjury. If you are filing a “Request for Order” (or responding to a “Request for Order”) asking that the Judge enter orders providing you...
Is a gift from your spouse really a gift? (CA)
When you are given a gift of substantial value from your spouse or Registered Domestic Partner, you might be in for a surprise at divorce in California. Why? If you do not have an express...
7 Tips for Collecting Your Family Law Money Judgment
So, you have spent months (or maybe even years) reaching a resolution in your matter, but the process is not over yet. If you received a money judgment against your ex-spouse as part of your...
Our Postnup Primer for California
Post-nuptial agreements are a written consensus between two parties, entered into after the marriage occurs. The purpose of a post-nuptial agreement (also known as Marital agreement or Transmutation agreement) is similar to the purpose of...
Five Tips for Successful Divorce Mediation in 2022
Mediation works when done right. It can be a fabulous way to reduce animosity, finalize a divorce quickly, keep your personal life more private, save money, and resolve conflict. But mediation is not right for...
Our Favorite Divorce and Co-parenting Books
You’ve separated from your child’s other parent. Life is tough, and litigation is messy. You are looking for good resources anywhere you can find them. • Do try a support group. • Do consult a...
Answers to Your Questions About Spousal Support
One of the key issues that arises in a divorce proceeding is spousal support, aka alimony. Spousal support comes in two varieties, temporary spousal support and long-term spousal support. Spousal support is something that has...
Unique Issues in Baby Boomer Divorce
It’s no secret that Baby Boomer divorces are on the rise. According to the Office for National Statistics, divorce has dwindled in every age group except for couples in their sixties. The U.S. Census Bureau...
Why is Date of Separation Important in a California Divorce?
"Date of separation" is often a hotly contested issue in California divorce actions. Why? The reason date of separation is so important is that the duration of a marriage often profoundly affects two important issues...
What to Do When Your Spouse is Missing
You may be wondering how to file for a divorce or other family law action when you don’t know where the respondent is. Sometimes the court allows litigants to serve documents other than by personal...
What is a Legal Coach, and Should I Get One?
How Will My Bonus Income Affect Child or Spousal Support?
Many employers give an annual or quarterly bonus to their employees when certain company or individual goals are met. A common theme throughout our practice are questions like will I have to pay support based...
What is the date of separation in California divorce?
One of the first questions a divorce lawyer will ask you when you come in for your initial consultation is, ‘What is your date of separation?’ Why is the date of separation so important, anyhow?...
What’s the Difference Between “Legal” and “Physical” Custody?
Legal custody is the right to make the major decisions concerning a child’s health, welfare and education, like where a child goes to school, and whether a child should receive medical care (or even who...
What Are My Options if I Want to End My Marriage? (CA)
There are three ways to end a marriage in California: you can get divorced, legally separated, or have an annulment. Only one party needs to want to end the marriage, and no agreement is necessary....
Will Spousal Support Increase When Child Support Terminates?
Child support ordinarily terminates when a child turns 18 years old unless the child remains a full time high student, in which case, support continues until the child graduates or turns 19 (whichever comes first)....
Suspect Your Spouse is Hiding Assets During Divorce?
Hopefully, you’re never in a situation where you believe that your spouse has failed to disclose marital assets in your divorce proceedings. Unfortunately, there are times when one party to the divorce or domestic partnership...
Understanding QDROs: Dividing Retirement Plans in Divorce
Do you have a 401k? A military pension? Is your spouse a federal employee or a police officer? Did you know that getting a divorce doesn’t automatically divide your retirement assets? Looking for more tips...
How Social Media Can Undermine your Divorce Action
More than ever, litigants and lawyers are using social media to collect information that they can use as ‘evidence’ in a Family Law Case. Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter, Instagram and various dating websites are all popular...
How Can I Enforce a Court Order for Child Visitation or Custody?
If your spouse isn’t complying with visitation schedules and child support rulings, you might just be pulling your hair out in desperate need of some stability, wondering where to go next. First, try speaking to...
How Do I “Serve” My Spouse with a Divorce in California?
"I keep hearing that I have to ‘serve’ my spouse for a divorce. What does this mean, and how can I do it?" The law affords everyone due process. In other words, before you can...
What is a Divorce by Default in California?
As if "divorce by default" isn’t obscure enough, there are actually two types, and one is very different from the other. Both types refer to a divorce where one party filed a Petition for Dissolution...
How to Slay Your Divorce Negotiations Like a Seasoned Pro
I’ll admit it. I don’t have a magic wand. I wish I did! But what I do have is 15 years of experience helping people navigate out of their marriage in integrity. I’ve settled the...
Should I File a Response to the Petition for Dissolution of Marriage in Utah?
If you are served with a Petition for Divorce and Summons in Utah, you are considered the Respondent spouse. The Petition is the document your spouse has filed with the Court to initiate divorce proceedings....
What Military Members Should Know When Divorcing in Utah
Military divorces can be complicated, whether you and/or your spouse are active members or past members. Below, you’ll find information to help you through the specifics of your process. Filing, Serving, and Answering the Petition...
What are Temporary Separation Orders and Decrees of Separate Maintenance? (UT)
Temporary Separation In cases where you and your spouse want to separate temporarily, intend to divorce if reconciliation doesn’t happen, this option might suit you. Either party can apply to the Court for a temporary...
How to Modify Child Support or Alimony During COVID-19 in Utah?
Losing your job or small business is devastating, especially if you’re also paying child support and/or alimony. While it is stressful, you shouldn’t be down on yourself; so many people are suffering the effects of...
Download: The Ultimate Guide to Divorce Mediation
So you have decided on a cooperative divorce. Congratulations! No really, we mean it. You will be saving thousands of dollars in legal fees and be in control of your own destiny—not leaving it up...
How to Survive Living With Your Ex During Covid
I have seen at least 5 articles lately about how “quarantining with my ex changed my life for the better” and while I am thrilled for them, I have had a very different experience. After...
How to Divorce Your Spouse in Colorado
Before seeking a divorce, it’s important to do your homework so you understand the divorce process, or seek legal assistance to get help understanding the nuances associated with this process. The state of Colorado has...
I am Not on Title to Our House, is it Still Considered Marital Property? (UT)
Since Utah is a marital property state, if the home was purchased during the marriage, then the answer is yes. Marital property refers to nearly everything purchased during the course of the marriage (with some...
Should I file an answer or counter-petition to my spouse’s petition for divorce in Texas?
If you are served with an Original Petition for Divorce in Texas, you are considered the Respondent spouse. The Petition is the document your spouse has filed with the court to initiate divorce proceedings. The...
About serving your spouse with divorce papers in Texas
“Serving” your spouse with divorce documents can seem kind of scary. But, there’s a few ways you can do it in Texas, and some of them don’t require you to “serve” your spouse at all!...
DOWNLOAD: What to Include in Your Settlement Agreement
All divorces require standard forms and processes, but the settlement agreement embodies the nitty-gritty elements specific to you and your spouse’s assets and life. We created a checklist to help you address all items necessary...
How do I serve my spouse with divorce papers in Texas?
I keep hearing that I have to ‘serve’ my spouse for a divorce. What does this mean? First things first – a divorce is actually a type of lawsuit. And before you can sue someone,...
How is spousal maintenance decided and calculated in Texas?
Spousal maintenance, also called spousal support or alimony, is either something agreed upon by both parties or is ordered by the court, depending on the circumstances of the marriage and consideration of various factors. It...
I was Served with a Petition for Divorce in Utah, Now What?
Your spouse has filed for divorce and you have received the initial paperwork. So, what are your next (or first) steps? Signing a Stipulation If you agree to the terms of the Petition, meaning that...
How Do I “Serve” My Spouse with a Divorce in Utah?
I keep hearing that I have to ‘serve’ my spouse for a divorce. What does this mean, and how can I do it? The law affords everyone due process.’ Or in plain English, before you...
How to Keep Your Divorce Conversations Productive
If you want better communication during divorce, remember first things first. If you want to negotiate a divorce agreement, you have to remember (and accept) the following principles: Be mindful that your purpose is to...
Breaking Down Common Parenting Time Schedules: Which Plan is Right for You?
When it comes to parenting time schedules, the options are as wide as your imagination. From month on/month off, to every other weekend schedule, there are as many schedules as there are days in the...
What Colorado Military Members Should Know When Divorcing
Military divorces can be complicated, whether you and/or your spouse are active members or past members. Below, you’ll find information to help you through the specifics of your process. Filing, Serving and Answering the Petition...
6 Mistakes Men, Especially Dads, Make During the Divorce Process
Divorce can be a tricky process for many men to navigate, particularly fathers. Men and dads get divorced, of course, but some divorces are more successful than others. If you are a man and or...
Divorce 101: California Divorce Law Video Tutorial
You may have already heard me say it before: Divorce is both Procedure & Substance. Procedure = forms, processing with the court, “service of process” (delivery of documents to your spouse). Substance = the issues...
Common-Law Marriage: What You Need to Know
Chances are, if you have lived with your significant other for a long period of time, someone you know has brought up the subject of common-law marriage. This may be because many people believe that...
How to file an agreed divorce with minor children in Texas & what to expect
Filing for divorce seems scary and difficult, right? We’re here to make it easier and less stressful. Below, we’ll walk you through the process of an agreed divorce with minor children in Texas, from start...
What Texas military members should know when divorcing
If you or your spouse are active or past members of the military, getting a divorce can be more complicated. Below, you’ll find information to help you through the specifics of your process. How do...
Tips for Getting Your Spouse On Board with Mediation in California
Mediation, whether through Hello Divorce, with a trained mediation counselor or a divorce financial planner, can be a great option for resolving the issues pertaining to your divorce. At Hello Divorce, we not only guide...
New California Law: The Judge Can Now Decide Who Gets Fido
In California, as of January 1, 2019, a judge may make “custody” orders regarding your pet. (AB-2274). This change in the law means that pets are no longer treated exclusively as property to be divided...
Divorce Therapy vs Coaching: How to Choose the Right Option for You
Therapist and divorce coach Dr. Kristin Davin, Psy.D. shares her best advice for choosing between divorce coaching or therapy.
Checklist: Questions to Ask a Potential Divorce Therapist or Coach
Interviewing a few therapists and/or divorce coaches in advance is an excellent investment of your time and a terrific way to determine fit – which can be the most important factor in a therapy/coaching relationship....
Why You Shouldn’t Panic if Your Spouse Talks to a Lawyer
Learning that your ex has sought legal help is *not* a reason to panic. They should get advice from an expert — and you should, too. The more information both parties have, the more amicable...
Three Ways Your Kid(s) Will Thrive in a Co-Parenting Relationship
Guess what? There’s a lot of good news when it comes to what the research says about children and divorce. In a nutshell, your kids are going to be just fine as long as you...
Worksheet: Create a Thoughtful Divorce Co-Parenting Plan
Our worksheet is designed to help you think through co-parenting details big and small, in advance. Completing this worksheet ahead of parenting plan discussions with your mediator or attorney can give you the space and...
Checklist: Shared Custody and Visitation
There's a lot to think about when you start your co-parenting journey. We're here to help take the stress out of this transition. Our checklist prompts you to plan what items to have on hand,...
How to Talk to Your Ex About Spousal and Child Support
Alimony/spousal support is one of the most difficult issues to negotiate. These tips and strategies will help you navigate the spousal support conversation with your ex.
I’m a Divorced Dad, and This is My Best Advice for Co-Parenting Your Kids
You’ll find yourself doing a lot of things you never expected to do on your own as a newly divorced dad. I did. Along the way, there were a few things I learned that I...
You’ve Been Dumped. Now What?
I was married and divorced by the time I turned 30. Not long after that, I entered what I like to call a “charitable rebound” that lasted about two years. After we “officially” moved in...
5 Awesome Post-Breakup Services You Didn’t Know You Needed
When you’re the founder of a post-breakup concierge service, you get to know a lot of interesting people offering interesting services that help people move past heartbreak. Here are a few services that we connect...
How to Tell Your Spouse You Want a Divorce (in the Most Amicable Way Possible)
Your relationship is over, but you’ve waited to have the “I want a divorce” talk. Here’s how to do it (nicely). It may seem insensitive or trivial. Who do I think I am, writing your...
Divorced Dads: Do These 5 Things
For some of us divorced dads, the approach of any holiday, from Mother’s Day to Valentine’s Day, is enough to bring on the cold sweats. Relax. Survival, even redemption, is attainable — and it’s not...
Understanding Spousal Support: The New Tax Bill Changes How Alimony Is Taxed
Starting January 1, 2019, one provision in the new tax bill could mean thousands of dollars saved or lost each year for those considering divorce.
Your Spouse Did Not Respond to Your Petition for Divorce in California. What Happens Next?
After you have served the Petition, your spouse has 30 calendar days to “respond”. By respond, we mean filing a “Response” (FL-12).If the thirtieth day falls on a weekend or a holiday, your spouse has...
What Are the Different Types of Court Hearings I Might Have to Attend? (CA)
The most common type of hearings in Family Court are related to child support, spousal support and/or child custody. These hearings are scheduled after one spouse files a “Request for Order.” Depending on the complexity...
A Petition and Response Has Been Filed, What’s Next for Divorce in California?
After both parties have filed and served their initial documents, the Petition, Summons and Response (Step 1), the real work begins. Step 2 is deciding if you need to file a Request for Order (“RFO”)...
What is Contempt?
In the course of your divorce, the family court may issue a range of orders, including visitation and custody determinations, orders to pay attorney’s fees, and divisions of property. When an ex-spouse (or soon to...
Special Considerations for Your Same Sex Divorce in California
We have all heard the good news. California no longer recognizes a distinction between same-sex and opposite-sex marriages. Any couple can now obtain a marriage license and wed, regardless of that couple’s sexual orientation. In...
10-Step Quick Guide for Tackling Divorce Financial Issues in California
Tackling the financial issues of divorce can be overwhelming, even for people who are comfortable with numbers. Sometimes, the biggest challenge is figuring out where to start. Follow this 10-step guide to increase your chance...
Six Steps to Take Before You Begin Divorce Mediation
Thinking about divorce mediation? Excellent idea if you and your spouse have the shared goal of uncoupling amicably or dissolving your marriage in a fair and cooperative way but have too many issues to resolve...
4 Reasons to Forgive Your Spouse in Divorce
“When you forgive somebody, it doesn’t necessarily mean you want to invite them to your table.” —Oprah Winfrey Often in a divorce, we get hurt. Not just everyday small slights. Whether it’s an ex who...
What’s the Difference Between Temporary vs. Permanent Support in Colorado?
Maintenance, also referred to as alimony, can be ordered for two different phases of divorce: 1) during the divorce proceedings, which is referred to as “temporary maintenance,” and 2) after the divorce is finalized, which...
How Do I “Serve” My Spouse with a Divorce in Colorado?
I keep hearing that I have to ‘serve’ my spouse for a divorce. What does this mean, and how can I do it? The law affords everyone ‘due process.’ Or in plain English, before you...
QDRO Glossary
Defining the QDRO-related terms you need to know.
Get to Resolution and Peace with Less Expense, Time and Stress with Mindful Divorce Mediation
As one of the top family law litigators in the country, I know the downside of the traditional litigation process. For many years as a top divorce attorney I watched thousands of clients spend huge...
Worksheet: Dating After Divorce
Whether you're introducing a new partner, meeting a new partner, or are the new partner, our worksheet will help you prepare for this meeting. Take the thoughtful steps outlined in our worksheet to ease the...
California Divorce Process: How and Where to File for Divorce
When it comes to the California divorce process, the first step is knowing how and where to file for divorce. You or your spouse will have had to live in California for six months, and...
Do I need to meet with a divorce lawyer before mediation?
It's a question I hear a lot: "Do I need to meet with a divorce lawyer or coach before I begin mediation with my spouse?" Short answer:
It’s November. Can I still get a divorce this year in California?
Q: “It’s November. Can I still get a divorce this year? If not, is there anything I can do to formally separate our property, earnings and accounts to prepare to start fresh in the New...
Does it matter who’s “at fault” in a divorce?
So many clients walk in to my office fuming at their ex – for cheating, lying, stealing or a laundry list of other unsavory activities. They aren’t always interested in a fair divorce settlement; they...
My QDRO Has Been Filed … Now What?
There is a lot to think about after divorce, and that includes thinking about your Qualified Domestic Relations Order(s) (QDRO), which will divide your retirement plan(s). You may have questions after your QDRO is filed...
How Do I Get My Share of Retirement Savings After Divorce?
The right time to think about securing your share of retirement funds in a divorce is at the beginning of the divorce process. Retirement savings can be an important bargaining tool as you divide your...
Guide to Health Insurance After Divorce
Health insurance during divorce ATRO exceptions Health insurance after your divorce is finalized What is COBRA? What if I incur health insurance charges in those 45 days? How much does COBRA cost? Other health insurance...
How to Get Through a High-Conflict Divorce
New reports of war-torn nations provoke intense fear and heartbreak. But what about “battling it out” in divorce? That is also unnecessary and leads to stress and heartache. War is never the answer, even in...
Earnings Assignments in California
The decision to file for divorce is rarely an easy one. However, once your judge signs the final divorce decree, the most difficult aspects of the divorce process should be behind you. In most cases,...
In a No-Fault State? What That Means for Your Divorce
If you live in a no-fault divorce state, you can divorce your spouse without having to prove your spouse did something wrong. In that same vein, they can divorce you without proving that you did...
When Can a Spouse Claim Alimony or Spousal Support?
In the wake of a divorce, spousal support, or alimony, may need to be paid by one spouse to the other. Understandably, lots of questions surround this issue. Maybe you’re currently filing for a divorce...
