Only a few short decades ago, you might have suffered a social stigma as a divorced individual. Today, a happily married couple who stays together for life seems more like the exception to the rule.
What happened in the last few decades that has turned marital statistics on its head?
Divorce is common, but current statistics can’t really pinpoint how common it is.
While it’s often repeated that “50% of all marriages end in divorce,” the reality of the U.S. divorce rate is less definitive than that. It depends on which records you’re citing and what you’re using as criteria.
The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) has published that 41.6% of marriages end in divorce filings, based on data from the past two decades. Other sources suggest that 40 to 50% of first marriages end in divorce, with second-marriage and third-marriage divorce rates even higher.
But while the research is inconsistent, the reality isn’t: No matter what statistics you adhere to, divorce is still very common. Why?
Society has shifted dramatically since our ancestors’ commitment to marrying young and staying married through thick and thin. The majority of women are now in the workplace, whereas before, a woman tended to stay home while her husband worked. Women have broad access to birth control now, too.
Media and entertainment no longer shy away from sexual content or real life, for that matter. We now have the internet, social media, and access to other cultures’ mores and values. Life has fast-forwarded from the 50s at the speed of light, and comparing life today to life then is like the proverbial apples to oranges.
Through their studies, researchers have identified some important social factors that create more risk for divorce. These include
But even couples without these risk factors face divorce. Couples navigating modern marriage face financial insecurity, infidelity, and other marital stressors each day. Without focused commitment to their marriage, a couple can be challenged from all corners of daily life today.
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While the internet itself doesn’t cause divorce, it has given us access to the world beyond our personal social bubble. Has that access led to an increase in the number of marriages that end? This can be debated, and studies don’t always come to the same conclusions.
Research varies depending on whether researchers are looking at data from online dating sites or the use of social media when looking for a correlation to the risk for divorce. You also need to consider sites like Ashley Madison that are specifically designed for people looking for extramarital relationships.
But does the internet cause more divorce? We believe that it’s unhappy couples who cause divorce. Has the internet made that easier? Definitely.
While Scandinavian studies have shown an increase in divorce rates in urban areas, other studies have shown little statistical significance to those findings. Some studies have suggested that, whether urban or rural, divorce statistics are more affected by the context of the community where a couple lives.
All these micro theories aside, break-ups are complicated, and the reasons that couples divorce can be as nuanced and complex as the couples themselves.
Bottom line: If you’re considering divorce – whether early in the relationship or after years of marriage – you’re not alone. But just as society has changed over the decades, so has the concept of the lawyer-driven divorce. Today, most divorcing couples simply want to get the legal entanglements over so they can go on with their lives.
Divorce can be cooperative, fair, and inexpensive with the right guidance. At Hello Divorce, we know that the adversarial nature of divorce is not only outdated, but it is also unhealthy. Schedule a free 15-minute call to see how your divorce can be different.
Why is the divorce rate considered high in the U.S.?
The U.S. divorce rate appears high because more people marry, people marry younger, and cultural norms support leaving unhealthy relationships. Economic stress, shifting gender roles, and better access to divorce also contribute.
Is the divorce rate actually increasing?
No. Divorce rates have declined over the past 30 years. What’s rising is awareness, openness about divorce, and second or later-life divorces.
What factors make divorce more likely?
High conflict, poor communication, financial stress, early marriage, lack of support systems, mental health challenges, and substance misuse all increase risk.
Do shifting gender roles affect divorce rates?
Yes. As more women gain financial independence, they’re less likely to stay in marriages that are unequal, unsafe, or emotionally draining.
Does social media impact divorce rates?
Social media can fuel comparison, secrecy, or emotional affairs, increasing tension in already fragile relationships.
Are Millennials and Gen Z divorcing more?
No. Millennials and Gen Z are divorcing less because they marry later, wait for stability, and choose partners more intentionally.
Review long-term divorce trends
Look at data across decades to see that divorce rates have actually decreased, even if awareness has increased.
Understand cultural and economic shifts
More independence, housing changes, and financial stress impact decisions to stay or leave.
Identify common relationship stressors
Note communication issues, conflict, unequal labor, and money pressure as major contributors.
Consider how gender roles have evolved
Recognize that many women now have more options and leave marriages that aren’t healthy or equitable.
Evaluate the role of technology and social media
Track how online connection, comparison, and secrecy influence dissatisfaction.
Understand different generational patterns
Younger generations tend to marry later, leading to more stable marriages and fewer divorces.
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