Kids & Pets

Get the tools you need to understand legal and physical custody (of kids and pets), develop an effective parenting plan, understand child support and add-ons (like childcare and medical expenses) and prepare for child custody mediation during the divorce process.

We are all amateurs at parenting which is a good reminder that nothing we do is going to be perfect (especially when there are so many needs and interests that have to be balanced). Kids are resilient and we’ve seen most of them survive (and thrive) post-divorce.

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Download: Divorce Glossary of Terms

Legalese made easy. This document has all the terms you’re likely to hear with definitions in plain English. Join us and download this free glossary of legal terms.

Ten Important Laws You Need to Know About (if You’re Getting a Divorce in California)

1. Spousal Support (Family Code Section 4320): While pre-judgment spousal support is generally calculated using a formula, long-term spousal support is determined by review of various factors. Some of the factors the court considers include:...

Our Favorite Resources for Life After Separation

On average, 4,800 Americans get divorced per day. You are certainly not alone. Yet at times, it feels like you are the only person getting a divorce. Parting ways after years of living together is...

Calculating Timeshare Kids Spend with Each Parent in California

When calculating child support, the amount largely depends on how much time your kids spend with each parent. In other words, support payments decrease as timeshare increases. Before filing a Request for Order for Child...

Complete List of CA, CO, UT Divorce Forms—with Links

Our exhaustive list of California divorce forms with links to download them.

My spouse can earn more but refuses to. How is this handled for purposes of Child Support?

When we calculate child support, we generally use the actual incomes of both spouses. But what happens when your spouse is under earning? That is, s/he is working less than full time and/or is not...

California Child Support Calculator

Use our convenient child support calculator to determine an estimate of California child support. Enter all of the requested information below, and the results will help inform your position for mediation and/or negotiation with your...

Best Practices for Supporting Students with Learning Disabilities in a Split Household

Even ‘happily’ married couples have difficulty effectively supporting their children. In some cases, especially when the parents have a child or children with a disability, the parents need to be even more united and consistent...

Changing a Child’s Last Name in California

What’s in a name? Well, for some people, a lot. At divorce, one parent may want to change their child’s last name. Usually this involves creating a hyphenated last name, so that the child’s surname...

10+ (Non-legal) Essential Apps to Rely on While Uncoupling

Getting unmarried can sometimes be as expensive, insanely time consuming and detail driven as planning your wedding. When we tie the knot in the first place, we use wedding planners, online worksheets, and various other...

10 Tips for Writing a Persuasive Family Law Declaration to be Attached to a California Request for Orders

A declaration is a written statement made under the penalty of perjury. If you are filing a “Request for Order” (or responding to a “Request for Order”) asking that the Judge enter orders providing you...

Child Custody Recommending Counseling and Mediation: What’s the Difference? (CA)

In a case involving children where the parties have not agreed on a parenting plan, the Family Law Court mandates that parents “mediate” prior to a hearing on the matter. Mediators have experience in counseling...

Parenting Resource for Divorcing Parents

I stumbled upon the “Parenting Plan Handbook” today from the San Diego Superior Court. I strongly encourage separating parents to take a look, particularly parents with small children. It’s very introductory and would not be...

Is a donor agreement enough to protect my same-sex partner from a challenge to her parental rights?

Is a donor agreement enough to protect your same sex partner from a challenge of parental right? Usually not. In California, maybe. In short, we recommend a second parent adoption or a ‘Paternity’ action to...

My Kid is 18 Years Old. Why Am I Still Paying Child Support?

You’ve been paying child support for years and years. You’re child has now turned 18 and you run down to the courthouse to request a termination of support — only to find it’s not as...

Will Child Support Change When I Get Remarried?

While we find that many of California’s family laws are common sensical, this issue is not. Unfortunately, the legal answer often ends up causing one parent serious frustration and a feeling of injustice. For purposes...

10 Facts You Should Know About CA Child Support Modification

California child support modifications got your head all turned around? Need help wading through the intricacies to come out the other side prepared and comfortable with everything you need to know about divorce and child...

Counting the Dollars and Cents: Keys to Child Support Add-Ons

If you are a single parent, you are probably familiar with the concept of child support. Child support is calculated using statewide guidelines, and while the court has discretion to deviate from the guideline calculation,...

Vacation Planning With Your Ex Driving You Crazy? Co Parenting Tips That Get The Job Done

Scheduling vacations, holidays and special days are time-consuming and exhausting. Who’s hosting Thanksgiving? Do you need to make travel arrangements? Do you really have to invite that pesky Uncle who falls asleep during dinner? Do...

Our Favorite Divorce and Co-parenting Books

You’ve separated from your child’s other parent. Life is tough, and litigation is messy. You are looking for good resources anywhere you can find them. • Do try a support group. • Do consult a...

Divorce and Pets: Who gets Fido?

In a divorce or domestic partnership dissolution, if the parties cannot come to agreement themselves on who gets ownership of a pet animal, the judge will now determine who gets custody – and they can...

Pre-Divorce Planning: Do You Have an Exit Strategy?

If you are considering leaving your Domestic Partner or Spouse, a good plan of action is essential. I am not talking about taking your ex for all you can. What is most important is making...

Tips for Court Ordered Child Custody Mediation (CA)

What is child custody mediation? If you and your former partner are unable to agree on child custody and/or visitation issues, you both will be required to participate in mandatory child custody mediation. The objective...

What is a Legal Coach, and Should I Get One?

How Will My Bonus Income Affect Child or Spousal Support?

Many employers give an annual or quarterly bonus to their employees when certain company or individual goals are met. A common theme throughout our practice are questions like will I have to pay support based...

Can a Special Master help in my child custody matter?

WHAT IS A SPECIAL MASTER? Special masters are often used in divorce and paternity actions when parents are having serious child custody issues related to custodial exchange disputes, visitation schedule changes, transportation disputes, religious training,...

What’s the Difference Between “Legal” and “Physical” Custody?

Legal custody is the right to make the major decisions concerning a child’s health, welfare and education, like where a child goes to school, and whether a child should receive medical care (or even who...

Can I Compel Payment of Child Support if Years Have Passed? FAQ

My ex stopped paying me the court-ordered child support years ago, but I never really went after him/her. Our son is now in college and I am having trouble helping him make ends meet. Can...

How Can I Get Parentage Rights if We’re Not Married?

"My ex-girlfriend is pregnant with our child, but she refuses to speak to me right now, and I’m worried I won’t be able to see our child when he’s born. What can I do?" In...

Who Gets Custody of the Children?

How do courts decide who gets physical and legal custody of the children? What if my child has already told me who they want to live it? “Best interest of the child”—the phrase that pays....

Are Three Parents a Crowd? Understanding California’s 3rd Parent Law

Most children have two parents, a mother and a father, two moms or two dads. But what about a child that has three (or more!) parents? A three – or more – parent family might...

Nesting as an Alternative Custody Arrangement

What is nesting? “Nesting” is a non-traditional custody arrangement where the children stay in the family home and the parents trade off living in the house with the children, much like birds taking turns in...

You, Your Spouse, and … (Third Parties Joined to Divorce Actions)

Most people are aware that in Divorce or Domestic Partnership Dissolution, certain employee benefit plans can be joined to the action to ensure that retirement accounts are divided prior to the completion of the case....

Will Spousal Support Increase When Child Support Terminates?

Child support ordinarily terminates when a child turns 18 years old unless the child remains a full time high student, in which case, support continues until the child graduates or turns 19 (whichever comes first)....

How Social Media Can Undermine your Divorce Action

More than ever, litigants and lawyers are using social media to collect information that they can use as ‘evidence’ in a Family Law Case. Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter, Instagram and various dating websites are all popular...

How Can I Enforce a Court Order for Child Visitation or Custody?

If your spouse isn’t complying with visitation schedules and child support rulings, you might just be pulling your hair out in desperate need of some stability, wondering where to go next. First, try speaking to...

10 (New) Terms to Include in Your Co-Parenting Agreement as a Result of COVID-19 (+ Checklist!)

Since March 2020, parents across the country have been navigating co-parenting during COVID-19, as parenting challenges unseen in the modern era have forced thousands of co-parents to court on an emergency basis. What happens when...

Tips for Navigating Divorce When Your Child Has Special Needs

Even in a two-parent household, the challenges of raising a special needs child bring both joy and hardship. Add in the complexity of divorce, and it can feel really overwhelming. My hope is that this...

Utah Divorce Education & Orientation Courses (Mandatory for Parents of Minors)

These classes are mandatory for divorcing parents of children under the age of 18. The Petitioner spouse must attend these courses within 60 days of filing the Petition for Divorce, and the Respondent spouse must...

Court-Ordered Mediation: What To Expect (UT)

In Utah, mediation is only made mandatory by the court when a divorce is filed with contested issues, meaning issues you and your spouse are not in agreement upon. In such cases, the Court mandates...

How to Modify Child Support or Alimony During COVID-19 in Utah?

Losing your job or small business is devastating, especially if you’re also paying child support and/or alimony. While it is stressful, you shouldn’t be down on yourself; so many people are suffering the effects of...

Shared, Split, or Sole Care for Your Child in Colorado? What You Need to Know.

Getting divorced with children can be a much harder, emotional experience. While needing to do what is best for you and your partner to move forward, you also have to plan for your children so...

How to Survive Living With Your Ex During Covid

I have seen at least 5 articles lately about how “quarantining with my ex changed my life for the better” and while I am thrilled for them, I have had a very different experience. After...

Colorado: What is Child Custody Mediation?

Depending upon which county you reside in, or if you and your former partner are unable to agree on child custody and/or visitation issues, you will likely be required to participate in child custody mediation. ...

How is Child Support Determined in Utah?

Child support can be granted during divorce, temporary separation, or as separate maintenance. Generally speaking, there is a legal duty for parents to support their children under the age of 18 but there are exceptions,...

Should I file an answer or counter-petition to my spouse’s petition for divorce in Texas?

If you are served with an Original Petition for Divorce in Texas, you are considered the Respondent spouse. The Petition is the document your spouse has filed with the court to initiate divorce proceedings. The...

How is child support calculated in Texas?

Child support in Texas is the money a parent pays to help with the cost of raising a child, including but not limited to food, housing, clothing, daycare, school supplies and extracurricular activities. Both parents...

Worksheet: Create a Texas Co-Parenting Plan

WORKSHEET: Create Your Co Parenting Plan

It’s time to create a divorce co parenting plan, and you obviously have a lot to think about. But don’t stress. We created a worksheet to help you think through co-parenting details, large and small....

Q&A: A Kid With Two Homes – A Child’s Perspective on Divorce

In the sea of websites, books and other adult-centered information about divorce, it can be difficult to find helpful information for children or resources from a child’s perspective. Enter A Kid With Two Homes, a blog by...

How do I serve my spouse with divorce papers in Texas?

I keep hearing that I have to ‘serve’ my spouse for a divorce. What does this mean? First things first – a divorce is actually a type of lawsuit. And before you can sue someone,...

How is spousal maintenance decided and calculated in Texas?

Spousal maintenance, also called spousal support or alimony, is either something agreed upon by both parties or is ordered by the court, depending on the circumstances of the marriage and consideration of various factors. It...

Breaking Down Common Parenting Time Schedules: Which Plan is Right for You?

When it comes to parenting time schedules, the options are as wide as your imagination. From month on/month off, to every other weekend schedule, there are as many schedules as there are days in the...

6 Mistakes Men, Especially Dads, Make During the Divorce Process

Divorce can be a tricky process for many men to navigate, particularly fathers. Men and dads get divorced, of course, but some divorces are more successful than others. If you are a man and or...

Divorce 101: California Divorce Law Video Tutorial

You may have already heard me say it before: Divorce is both Procedure & Substance. Procedure = forms, processing with the court, “service of process” (delivery of documents to your spouse). Substance = the issues...

How to file an agreed divorce with minor children in Texas & what to expect

Filing for divorce seems scary and difficult, right? We’re here to make it easier and less stressful. Below, we’ll walk you through the process of an agreed divorce with minor children in Texas, from start...

What Texas military members should know when divorcing

If you or your spouse are active or past members of the military, getting a divorce can be more complicated. Below, you’ll find information to help you through the specifics of your process. How do...

Illness, Kids & Co-Parenting: How to Cope

One Friday afternoon when I was 34, I was having some follow-up testing done after a “funny” breast MRI, and ended up with a breast cancer diagnosis. My six year-old daughter was on her way...

Three Ways Your Kid(s) Will Thrive in a Co-Parenting Relationship

Guess what? There’s a lot of good news when it comes to what the research says about children and divorce. In a nutshell, your kids are going to be just fine as long as you...

Worksheet: Create a Thoughtful Divorce Co-Parenting Plan

Our worksheet is designed to help you think through co-parenting details big and small, in advance. Completing this worksheet ahead of parenting plan discussions with your mediator or attorney can give you the space and...

Checklist: Shared Custody and Visitation

There's a lot to think about when you start your co-parenting journey. We're here to help take the stress out of this transition. Our checklist prompts you to plan what items to have on hand,...

How to Talk to Your Ex About Spousal and Child Support

Alimony/spousal support is one of the most difficult issues to negotiate. These tips and strategies will help you navigate the spousal support conversation with your ex.

I’m a Divorced Dad, and This is My Best Advice for Co-Parenting Your Kids

You’ll find yourself doing a lot of things you never expected to do on your own as a newly divorced dad. I did. Along the way, there were a few things I learned that I...

How to Tell Your Spouse You Want a Divorce (in the Most Amicable Way Possible)

Your relationship is over, but you’ve waited to have the “I want a divorce” talk. Here’s how to do it (nicely). It may seem insensitive or trivial. Who do I think I am, writing your...

Divorced Dads: Do These 5 Things

For some of us divorced dads, the approach of any holiday, from Mother’s Day to Valentine’s Day, is enough to bring on the cold sweats. Relax. Survival, even redemption, is attainable — and it’s not...

What Are the Different Types of Court Hearings I Might Have to Attend? (CA)

The most common type of hearings in Family Court are related to child support, spousal support and/or child custody. These hearings are scheduled after one spouse files a “Request for Order.” Depending on the complexity...

What is Contempt?

In the course of your divorce, the family court may issue a range of orders, including visitation and custody determinations, orders to pay attorney’s fees, and divisions of property. When an ex-spouse (or soon to...

Special Considerations for Your Same Sex Divorce in California

We have all heard the good news. California no longer recognizes a distinction between same-sex and opposite-sex marriages. Any couple can now obtain a marriage license and wed, regardless of that couple’s sexual orientation. In...

California Family Court Custody Mediation vs. Private Mediation: Which Should I Choose?

The goal of mediation is to help you and your spouse come to agreements regarding your children. Assuming you and your spouse are in agreement, you can choose to opt out of working with a...

Colorado (Required) Parenting Classes by County

When divorcing with minor children in Colorado, some counties will require you to attend parenting classes. Click on your county’s class link in the list below to see what is required. County Approved Parenting Classes...

The Main Issue When Divorcing with Children in Colorado: What Does Parental Responsibility Mean? How is it Decided?

Colorado does not use terms like “joint custody” and “sole custody.” Instead, the term is “parental responsibility,” and the Court’s default approach is that it should be equal between the two parents. However, the Court’s...

Worksheet: Dating After Divorce

Whether you're introducing a new partner, meeting a new partner, or are the new partner, our worksheet will help you prepare for this meeting. Take the thoughtful steps outlined in our worksheet to ease the...

Guide to Successful Co-Parenting After Divorce

What is co-parenting? How to create a co-parenting plan A child’s basic physical and emotional needs Crafting your plan Resources for successful co-parenting Raising a child is a huge, decades-long project. It’s intense, time-consuming, and...

Dog Owner? The Benefits of Pet Insurance in Divorce

Who gets the dog (or other pet)? Sharing custody of a dog, cat, or other pet(s) Benefits of pet insurance Pet insurance in divorce Lapse in coverage: A potential pitfall People love their pets and...

Guide to Health Insurance After Divorce

Health insurance during divorce ATRO exceptions Health insurance after your divorce is finalized What is COBRA? What if I incur health insurance charges in those 45 days? How much does COBRA cost? Other health insurance...

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