Divorce Survival Tips for ESTP Personality Types
The ESTP personality is extroverted, sensing, thinking, and perceiving.
ESTPs tend to be highly energetic and the “life of the party.” They are hands-on, action-oriented people who like to dive right into whatever task stands before them, often without thinking much about the big picture first. Others are drawn to the social energy of the ESTP, which may be why these folks are inclined to be successful business people and entrepreneurs. Although bold and daring, ESTPs may sometimes be seen as defiant and insensitive.
Tips for handling divorce as an ESTP
Make big decisions over a period of days or weeks
An ESTP’s first instinct may be to rush through settlement talks for the sake of getting them over with. But the agreements you make now could affect you (and your kids, if you have them) for the rest of your life, so allow yourself time to ponder your decisions. This also goes for other divorce-related choices you might need to make, such as which mediator, financial analyst, or attorney to hire.
Think before speaking
Chances are you’ve had your share of difficult conversations lately, whether with your soon-to-be-ex, kids, family, or others in your life who care about you. ESTPs tend to be impulsive in nature, often speaking before vetting the words that come out of their mouth. But in this phase of your life, what you say aloud could work for or against you later.
Resist your urge to blurt, and think it through. Use the “THINK” acronym: Is what you are about to say True, Helpful, Inspiring, Necessary, and Kind? If you answer “no” to any of these questions, hit the pause button on your conversation, and come back to it later.
Cultivate new friendships
On your divorce journey, you may start noticing other people in situations similar to yours. For example, you might join a divorce support group where you can meet others who share your experiences. This is an excellent time to meet new people and expand your tribe. It can help you feel less alone as you restart your life as a single person.
Look to your future
As an ESTP, you may be accustomed to living in the here and now. But your future is wide open, and it could use some attention and planning. Ask yourself big future-oriented questions. Where do you want to be in five years? Are you on track, financially, for your retirement? What about your spiritual needs and goals?
Try not to wallow in your divorce grief, which will surely fade over time. Instead, embrace this time of change as a catalyst for rebirth.
Analyze what went wrong
Marriage is a two-way street, and it’s likely that you both played a role in the relationship’s demise. Still, this can be a valuable learning opportunity for you and a chance to grow and improve your relationships.
Without judgment, analyze your contributions to the marriage and its downfall. How can you do better next time? File this information away, and use it to your advantage if you decide to start dating again.
Recommended reading for ESTPs
ESTPs excel at throwing themselves into new challenges, but divorce is one challenge that’s best met with support. At Hello Divorce, we love helping people through this trying period of life, and we’re good at it. If you’re curious, give us a ring for your free 15-minute informational call.